switchblade Annie (hidethesmoke) wrote,
switchblade Annie

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writer without a cause..

they say if you just start writing eventually it becomes like an unconscious stream that flows out of you. i guess my thoughts are stopped up somewhere between the creek and a damn.
did that make sense?
probably not.

i gotta be up in a few hours . my landlord's comin over to fix the stove. well the oven if you want to get technical about it ... its funny, i really dont cook, at all, and im not even really that dependant on the oven - but as luck would have it. directly before mass meltdown of said appliance, i went out groccery shopping and focused almost all my attention on defrostable food. heh. u *CAN* make this shit in the microwave i suppose, but it never defrosts right, its always still frozen in the middle, its just not ever as good .. so i've been up the creek without a paddle. i should've just called the landlord 2 weeks ago when this first started, but im a lazy sonofabitch .. i just ate takeout pretty much everyday instead. oh yeah, like thats gonna help my case eh? eh.

i've roped myself into a 9am friendly coffee and chat with the landlord and his brother while they're over trying to figure out whats wrong with the goddamn thing. great. what do i do, do i sit here and make small talk? do i retire back to my room and stare longingly at the bed? stay up and watch HORRIBLE morning talk t.v.? oh the choices.

again with the i should be sleeping .. its one of those nights. like when u know you've got 5 bucks to your name, and you just go out and spend it on crap anyway? even tho you KNOW you really needed gas to get home? ever do that sorta shit? no? well then yr not bi polar. lucky fucking you.

hung out with dana and meegz the other day... that was awesome. i miss the shit outta dana. that girl makes me laugh. i was a bit worried at first, she seemed kinda dispondent, but i suppose if u add up the extrenuating (again with the is that a word?) circumstances surrounding our social gathering, i suppoe it makes sense.

i cant believe joes dead. i say that everytime someone i know dies. " i cant believe spencers dead. "
"wow. i cant believe jeff is dead." "omg what? i cant believe it. jodys dead?" "what! i cant believe it.. stef is dead?" "joe? are u sure? joes dead ? i cant believe it."

fuck man. you'd think my social circle would have a longer life expectency then a buncha has-beens in the gerriactric ward. apparently not. did i cross the line on that one? i hope so. thats what i was going for.

yeah this typing without a cause thing isnt so bad... i could go on for a while and kill a few minutes bitching and griping.. without a doubt. im good at that. or maybe i could try to re-iterate some insiteful knowledge er some crap.
but why bother. my back hurts. im gonna go lay in bed and cuddle up with my kitties. their better company then this decrepid excuse of a fucking cpu.


i'll leave u all with this quote i found on a bizarre website. its dark. i enjoy it.

The darkness is death - we can speak, but we are not heard. We can scream but they turn their backs. We can run, but we cannot catch them. It is the dream where arms and legs won't work they way they should, and the air is too thick to breathe. Loved ones walk a mile ahead, forgetting to stop as we fall behind. This is the reality of the darkness. We are buried alive inside ourselves
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